DBT Skills for When You’re Spiraling: What to Do in the First 5 Minutes
- Katelyn Baxter-Musser, LCSW
- Aug 3
- 3 min read
It can come on without warning.....your chest tightens, your thoughts race, and everything suddenly feels too loud or like you’re not feeling anything at all. Whether you’re panicking or shutting down, you recognize the signs: you’re spiraling, and it feels completely out of your control.
This is the experience of an emotional spiral. And if you’ve lived through trauma, chronic invalidation, or emotional dysregulation, it’s likely all too familiar. But here’s the truth: while you may not always be able to prevent a spiral, you absolutely can interrupt it.
In Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), we focus on what you can do right now, not just in theory but in real life, in the moment. The five minutes after a trigger are critical, and they don’t have to be a free fall.
Here’s a first-aid kit of DBT skills to help you ground, soothe, and regain control in those intense first moments.
1. TIPP Skill: Activate Your Body to Regulate Your Mind
When you're spiraling, your nervous system is hijacked. Your fight, flight, or freeze response take control. That’s where the TIPP skill (from DBT’s Distress Tolerance module) comes in.
T – Temperature: Change your body temperature quickly to signal your nervous system to slow down and shift out of panic mode.
Splash cold water on your face
Hold an ice pack or frozen washcloth
Submerge your face in a bowl of cold water for 10–20 seconds
I – Intense Exercise: Get your heart rate up with 30–60 seconds of jumping jacks, fast walking, or jogging in place.
P – Paced Breathing: Slowing down your breath can calm your nervous system.
Inhale for 4 counts
Exhale for 6 counts
Repeat for 1–2 minutes
P – Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Tense and release different muscle groups, one at a time. This releases physical tension and signals your body that it’s safe to relax.
2. Name What’s Happening: Out Loud if You Can
Spiraling thrives in confusion. Clarity interrupts chaos.
Try saying to yourself:
“I feel overwhelmed, but I’m not in danger right now.”
“This is a trauma response. I’ve lived through worse. I can handle this.”
“My body is reacting, but I have tools to calm down.”
Labeling what’s happening activates your prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for decision-making and regulation. You don’t need to fix it. You just need to name it.
3. Ground Through the Senses: The 5-4-3-2-1 Method
Bring yourself back to the present moment with this simple technique:
5 things you can see
4 things you can feel (touch)
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
Say each one out loud if possible. The goal isn’t to distract from your emotions. Rather it’s to anchor yourself in the here and now so the emotion doesn’t take over completely.
4. Use a Self-Soothing Object or Ritual
Have a “go-to” that grounds you. This can look a variety of different ways such as:
A smooth stone or crystal in your hand
Wrapping up in a weighted blanket
A favorite scent (lavender, vanilla, eucalyptus)
A short playlist of calming music
Touching a grounding bracelet or talisman
The ritual itself creates a sense of predictability. It says, I know what to do when this happens.
5. Choose ONE Effective Action (Even If It's Small)
When you feel powerless, taking even the smallest action matters.
Ask yourself:
Can I move to a quieter space?
Can I send a quick text to a safe person?
Can I drink a glass of water?
Can I sit down and just breathe for one minute?
In DBT, we talk about being effective, doing what works, not what feels perfect. The goal isn’t to erase the spiral, it’s to stop the freefall and reconnect with your ability to cope.
You Don’t Have to Be Calm to Be in Control
A common misconception is that DBT is about “fixing” emotions or stopping them entirely. It’s not. DBT helps you build a life worth living, even when your emotions feel too big.
When you start using these skills, don’t expect them to work perfectly the first time. That’s not the point. The point is to build a new pattern. One where you meet emotional intensity with care, skill, and self-respect.....not shame.
The spiral may feel overpowering but the fact that you try to respond with a skill, even when it’s hard, is a powerful act of strength.
If this resonated with you…
Share this blog with someone else on the healing path
I’d love to hear what resonated most for you. Feel free to share in the comments
Explore more DBT-informed healing on Instagram: @thedbttherapist